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It is interesting how so many people when discussing their problem with me tell me the Situation or (A)ctivating event then tell me how they feel or behave (C) Seldom will they highlight their thinking or (B)eleifs.

How can any activating event cause us to feel something inside of us unless of course it was a direct physical force? This was the question asked by the originator of cognitive therapy: Dr Albert Ellis.

Within our belief system we create irrational non-self helping demands with inaccurate definitions, these lead to anxiety, anger and depression.  A flexible preference leads to sadness, annoyance or concern at worst, these are healthy negatives.   When I present my seminars on REBT and hypnotherapy some of the participants are trying too hard to get their clients to be super dooper relaxed.

When we de-essentialize our beliefs into preferences we give ourselves the all important out and release negative energy.  this is the basis of REBT and hypnotherapy with me.