Belief in self is central to good health. Hesitancy holds the energy in the body up therefore making you feel ill. I utilise the persons past successful experiences and show you how to capitalise on this learning in situations that you find difficult, so that you achieve your goal in a way that is exclusive to your requirements. As ever, as well as hypnotherapy, we will also use the most statistically effective therapy of all time; Cognitive Behaviour Therapy.
Demands detract from Confidence:
If you have a perception that you dislike, you can be fairly confident that you will compensate for this by demanding that you must not have it. So the person falls into the trap of pouring petrol onto the “fire”, then demanding that they must put it out. This concept may be glaringly simple, yet many of us fall into this trap and it causes emotional problems. Our natural predisposition to think irrationally can be exacerbated by sociological factors, such as adults and inanimate objects being bigger than us, upbringing and how we relate to other siblings within the family constellation.
In order to compensate and ignore the fact that we are and probably always will be highly inefficient mistake-making animals, we create fiction, myths and then become even more insecure when the goal is not attained thus demanding even more that we must achieve it.
To comprehend the way demands work, this may be a useful exercise do. Imagine that I have approached you and in a polite, relaxed manner asking you to recall your telephone number. I would presume that you would be able to easily and effortlessly remember it. That is what we all wish in our life, effortless effectiveness. Functioning this way, we can remember, be creative and to the best of our ability, enjoy our life. Our memory will improve, our immune system will function better and we will reduce the excessive adrenaline, which is one of the stress hormones, in our bodies. It therefore follows that we will be less stressed. Need convincing?
Ok. Now imagine a different scenario. Visualise that I have just walked up to you in an aggressive manner, and then suddenly produced a gun. I have pointed it at your head and shouted “You must recall your telephone number in five seconds and if not I will shoot you.”
Can you remember your telephone number now? I would presume that you would blanch, your heart rate would increase and your ability to communicate would be impaired. Does this remind you of any other situations in your life where you feel stressed? Check out the demands. They will always start with a SHOULD, an OUGHT, or a MUST. They, in my view, come from the conscience, the moral arbitrator of the psyche. They are society’s rules and introjected parental demands passed down to you. So what can we do to reduce this stress? Easy, shift the SHOULDS, the OUGHTS, and the MUST to preferences, wishes and hopes. There is very little value in just parroting or intellectually believing them. Preferences have to be worked at after the demands have been vigorously disputed so that they can be emotionally felt and enjoyed.
Try the same exercise again only this time see me wearing yellow Wellington boots, kilt, string vest, tattoos on my arms saying “I love mum” and “Scotland forever”, ginger wig and tartan hat saying “I prefer you to tell me your telephone number, and if not it’s ok. ”
You will notice the good effect humour has. It has been proved to assist in better immune system functioning. Psycho neuro immunology; it is hard to be stressed when happy.
Exclusive hypnotherapy provide 2 ways to help:
- Hypnotherapy and Psychotherapy from my Chilvern Cottage practice in Edinburgh
- Confidence MP3 download