Solving The Sleep Problem!
By Robin W. Thorburn: The Longest Established Hypno-Psychotherapist in Edinburgh exclusivehypnotherapy.co.uk and Director of ellisrebt.com the (original cognitive therapy).
Difficulties with sleep are usually stress/anxiety related.
Clients ask me what the difference between stress and anxiety is. Stress is the body’s reaction to prolonged pressure. When the nervous system becomes sensitized or amplified in its reaction to external events. The person can then become anxious about those symptoms! They can then panic when they tell themselves just how horrible those awful symptoms are. Horiibilizing the awfulize in cognitive parlance!
Due to the forgoing cycle the sufferer becomes fearful of the state he or she is now in. A fear, bewilderment, fear cycle. “Naturally” this fear vicious cycle follows them to bed. It is hard to sleep with this amount of discomfort. The person then projects into the future with the dreaded “what if” I am no use to function tomorrow thoughts. This of course equals more adrenalin and you guessed it: more awake. More frustration and awfulizing is sure to follow!
In short, we are in the metaphorical cycle of every time the doorbell rings and the dog barks, the dog barks louder the next time the doorbell rings.
A very good rule of thumb in psychology is that demands, (shoulds, oughts and musts) and inaccurate definitions (global self, other or world ratings) create anxiety, anger and depression. Debilitating. Whilst preferences and “so what” equal sadness, annoyance concern. All of which are overcomeable.
An example would be a student who tells me that he is anxious as he has an exam coming up. I ask him what are you telling yourself about the exam? Invariably the reply is: I must get an A if not I am a total failure and what would people think of me, which leads to anxiety, rather than: I would prefer to get an A and if not, too bad which would lead to a-concern.
When we move our demands in preferences, we reduce pressure on the nervous system and reduce adrenalin. We are more likely to be relaxed during the day and at night and then sleep better.
The best tranquilizer of them all is acceptance based on knowledge and understanding. Dr Claire Weekes.
I encourage my clients to then see bed as a wonderful opportunity to rest, rejuvenate and feel good in not a place of danger or conflict or a worry nest of negative “self-hypnosis”. Relaxing towards bed is a useful way to sleep better, taking time to read or listen to something lighthearted and calmly thinking of the day ahead with positivity. I like my clients define the day rather than let the day define them.
If at first the person is not asleep within five minutes (some people believe this should be the case) I ask them not afulize, catastrophize, magnify, anxietize, depressitize over this.
A deep breath let the body slump by imagining a puppet getting its strings cut.
If anxiety was a wave, then standing up against it would knock you over. Go under the wave, you will come out on the other side.
Gradually moving your thoughts to pleasant experiences and engaging the senses of visualization, kinesthetic, auditory and imagining the sun shining down out of a clear blue sky warming your head and shoulders, blue sea with wisps of clouds in the sky and the warm salt sea breeze with soft white sand under your feet and letting go of old doubts worries like a twig on a stream being carried towards the open sea, or like a stalactite of ice melting in a heat wave will calm the nervous system and engage the conscious mind thus allowing the unconscious to take you to pleasant relaxing sleep.
Sweet dreams.
Robin W. Thorburn ADHP (NC) MNRHP FNSHP UKCP (H)
Robin will be Leading Hypnotherapy Training in May. Please see: www.exclusivehypnotherapy.co.uk/hypnotherapytraining-in-edinburgh/